


The Urge

by multifanwho



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Short One Shot, Useless Lesbians, actually there's going to be 3 parts to this, one of these days I'll write a one shot and it will stay a one shot, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2018-12-17
Packaged: 2019-09-20 04:07:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17015403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/multifanwho/pseuds/multifanwho
Summary: "Do you believe in love?""Not sure""You'll get the urge someday."





	1. Chapter 1

“Yaz?” the Doctor whispers to the darker woman laying with her back to her on the other side of the bed. Her friend couldn’t sleep alone after a dangerous encounter with one of the Doctor’s old foes, the cybermen. After facing a machine programmed to have no emotions the Doctor had started to think about one emotion in particular.

“Yeah Doctor?”

“Do you believe in love?”

“What?”

“You know, the concept of love. Loving someone.” The Doctor wonders if the brunette had opened her eyes or if her face was scrunched in confusion and annoyance at her out of the blue interrogation.

“Not sure.” Yaz gives her answer. “It’s a bit overrated, like in movies and stuff. I don’t think I’ve ever been in it.”

“Would you like to be in it?” The blonde questions further.

“If it happens it happens.”

“You’ll probably get the urge one day.”

“Urge? What urge?” Yaz laughs.

“To be held. To share amazing experiences with someone you just connect with so much. To watch that special someone succeed but also help them get through experiences of failure and watch them grow. The urge to just chill out and watch a film but at the same time you would jump their bones the second they asked you to.”

The Doctor sees Yaz’s chest release air from her lungs. Was she in disbelief at the Doctor rambling what she thought was nonsense or smiling at the ideas the Doctor was putting forward?

“You know you just want to spend every waking moment with just that one and then every moment you sleep they are safe and warm next to you too. The urge starts as an urge but before you know it it’s a want. Like a- like a need. Like you’re going to suffocate in the world without that someone by your side. Just that one specific person – or maybe even a few – that you just want to be with no matter what.”

“You’re sounding like the movies.” The Doctor can tell that the younger girl is smiling from her voice.

“But wouldn’t it be brilliant to have that feeling?”

A gentle silence slowly fills the room. The Doctor assumes Yaz has got bored with her talking so much when they were both supposed to be getting a good night’s rest.

“Doctor, do you believe in love?”

The older and more experienced being turns away from looking at the back of Yaz and stares at the TARDIS ceiling, programmed to project the stars surrounding the blue box on its inside. She sighs as she watches the balls of gas burn and expand and swirl against the black background . She’d thought about this before, many times in fact.

“I don’t think the universe will ever let me.”

“Maybe one day the universe will let both of us believe.” Yaz yawns.

“Yeah,” the Doctor rolls her head on the soft pillow to gaze at the perfectly shaped silhouette of her friends body. She liked to just look at her. She was too scared to touch, like she was some sacred artifact in a museum you would get punished for meddling with. “maybe one day.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Doctor?” Yaz whispers into the darkness. Herself, the Doctor, Graham and Ryan were all sleeping in the same room of a tavern in 1499 England. The boys took the floor to seem chivalrous to the landlord, who was the same guy they were investigating, so her and the Doctor decided to share the slightly lumpy and uncomfortable bed. The pair laid on their backs and listened to the two boys snore.

“Yeah?” The Doctor whispers back.

“This is going to sound weird.”

“Try me.”

“Do you ever get angry?”

“When you’ve traveled for as long as I have you’re bound to run into situations you don’t agree with.”

“But does that make you angry? Like blood boiling, raging, angry?”

“Some situations yes. Why do you ask?”

“I don’t believe that you’re just all laughs and excitement. Sometimes I watch you assess the situation and your face goes like steel and I just wonder what you’re feeling and how you deal with it without letting any of us see.”

“I try and hide it.”

“Why? Don’t you trust us?”

“I’m afraid that I’ll scare you all away if I act on the anger, so I control it best I can.” The Doctor says sternly.

“You’re allowed to have emotions Doctor. A normal reaction to something wouldn’t scare me.”

“I used to be called the Oncoming Storm.”

“And? You _used_ to. So what?

The Doctor laid their silently. Yaz hoped she was mulling over her words and seeing some sense. She hopes she hadn’t offended her but sometimes the Doctor needs to be reminded she isn’t a lone traveler anymore.

“You lot make me good.” She finally breathes into the still darkness of the room. Yaz tentatively reaches her arm over to where she thinks the Doctor would have her hands resting. She finds the Doctor’s hands intertwined and fiddling with each other resting on her chest. Yaz pulls them apart and holds the nearest next to her and pulls it down so that their intertwined fingers rest in the gap between their bodies.

“We aren’t going anywhere. I’m certainly not.”

“Don’t say that. They always say that and then something bad happens.”

“You always tell people to trust you, Doctor, but I think you need to trust in your own feelings more.”

“I’ll just have to fight to keep you all.” The Doctor says and Yaz feels her hand getting softly squeezed.

“You don’t need to fight for me.” Yaz says trying to speak as softly as possible to reassure the blonde laying next to her that it’s safe to feel secure with her, and not have to constantly fear losing her. “I’m with you, whatever happens.”


	3. Chapter 3

It was late at night and the Doctor and Yaz lay together in bed in Yaz’s childhood bedroom. Yaz insists it isn’t a childhood bedroom as she’s an adult and the room has been decorated to reflect that. The two lay on their sides facing each other, faces softly lit by a nearby lamp.

“I’ve never been to a sleepover before.” The Doctor says quietly.

“I’ve never been to one either.”

“Really? I though that’s what human children did all the time.”

“The pretty white girls maybe. Don’t forget my so called best friend made the entire school turn on me.”

“Sorry Yaz, I did know that.”

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it.” Yaz brushes it off. “Did you have a best friend when you were growing up, Doctor?”

“Yeah, Missy, well he was known as the Master back then but he regenerated into a female body and thought the title should change too. Bit weird really but yeah, she was my friend. I say was because most of the time after we weren’t considered children anymore we just fought.”

“Why’s that?”

“She wanted to destroy the universe when I just wanted to see it. And she kept trying to kill me. And she did kill some of my friends.”

“Is she still around?” Yaz asked concerned. She didn’t want to be on the end of this Missy character if she went around killing the Doctors friends.

“No. I don’t think she’ll be bothering me anytime soon.”

“Did you have any other best friends? You’re like thousands of years old, right?”

“I did but..” The Doctor tails off and Yaz gets scared that she’s hit a raw emotional spot. The Doctor stares directly into Yaz’s eyes as a single tear slowly makes its way down her cheek. The tear was like a punch in the stomach for Yaz. She should’ve known that the Doctor had most likely outlived her loved ones, she even said they were all gone the first day they met.

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said.” Yaz apologises, lifting her hand and wiping the tear from the Doctor’s face.

“It’s fine.” She smiles and sniffs. “I have you now.”

“Don’t tell Graham and Ryan that.” Yaz laughs. She’s flattered that the Doctor considers her to be so important but Graham and Ryan have both equally been loyal friends to the time lord.

“You know I care deeply the guys but you’re special to me Yaz.” The Doctor whispers.

“Really?” Yaz asks and the Doctor watches her face soften.

“Yeah you’re-“ She pauses holding Yaz in suspense. She doesn’t know why her hearts were beating faster than normal. She gulps. “You’re Yaz.”

“And you’re you, Doctor.”

“And I’m Sonya cutting in to tell you two to just kiss already.”

“We should’ve just gone back to the TARDIS I’m so sorry about her.” Yaz basically mouths so that her sister doesn’t hear.

“It’s fine. I’d rather her think I’m with you and not Ryan. Ugh or even Graham.”

The pair laugh as quietly as possible to not stir another comment from Yaz’s younger sister. Once the laughter at the idea of the Doctor and Graham seeing each other wore off, both blonde and brunette felt an urge.

“We should get to sleep.” The Doctor breaks the trance. She’s used to pushing down the urge by now. Yaz nods in agreement and rolls over to switch off the lamp and stays facing that way.

“Yaz?”

“Yeah Doctor?”

“Is it okay if I hug you?” The Doctor asks with slight hesitance.

“You mean spoon me?”

“If that’s what it’s called then, yes.”

Yaz reaches round behind her and grabs the Doctors arm, placing it across her stomach without hesitation.

“You don’t have to ask, Doctor.”

Neither of them can see one another, but they both timidly smile at the idea of being held close by the other.  


End file.
